Having finished off some guards last time outside the bandit cave, we cautiously entered. We were met just outside the cave by some Ogres sent by King Rulf to assist us – two players who can’t attend as often as they’d like to. They’re brothers, twins, and very strong (even if one is a little short). One is a merchant, the other a priest, who supports the general Ogre religion and was clearly sent to us by Rulf because he didn’t want to be told he wasn’t warlike enough.
We just loved the view of Ogre merchants and priests. “You will buy this for 10!” and “REPENT!” being repeated while the target is lifted and shaken until they give up and do as they’re told!
Investigating the caves, we found a very small shieldwall in a narrow corridor, big enough for only three to stand abreast. It was hard to break them since our missile shooting was poor (and mostly rocks) – even though I gave my bow to someone with twice the skill I had. We charged in, such as we could and then smash. Slowly. Their shields were good. When we finally broke a gap in the line, our Ogre merchant took advantage of the gap by tossing our rigger (a Dwarf) into it to cause surprise and smash heads. Thankfully, he got a special roll on the throw and the Dwarf landed perfectly.
Then out of the melee the bandit leader came out and shouted to us, asking if anyone would challenge him on-on-one. Since even with his clan around him we outnumbered them, I thought “why bother? it only benefits him!” and that was the majority view until one of our party chose to sacrifice himself (the player wanted a new character). We didn’t want to throw his life away though, so he cast Strength on himself, and we cast Demoralise on the bandit chief. He lasted a few rounds, and at some point I thought we’d all best sneak around and kill off the chief anyway – one-on-one honour for a thief? Pah! Then a good hit took him out, and the clan surrendered. We have stripped them, looted every nook and cranny of the cave and got some good gear for our new recruits (and some of us still wearing animal furs) and intend to take them back to King Rulf for a bounty.
I missed the next week, but the party made it back to the King’s camp, managed to sell the loot and buy some nice full suits of armour (the problems of missing a week, you miss the good gear), and got a new boat to take us to the capital – the SS Sea Otter Foreplay. It’s like an Ogre yacht, and I think it’s fair to say that we were all thinking of the Lonely Island video “I’m on a boat”.
Our Ogre merchant almost lost an arm to a shark (gaining in return a crippling fear of water and finding himself the religion of the Earth god), and the party stole a farm. They were told that they found some good grazing land, and as I understand it they forged some ownership documents to prove that they owned it?
When I rejoined the party, we were sailing to the capital. We found a couple of uninteresting islands (no more vulnerable farms, armour merchants or deadly sharks) and then came upon the capital just in time to see a bunch of nasty looking, sleek and rapid ships leaving the harbour. They were recognised as the Drannai, the evil Elves that use magic who live on the central island. We pretty much guessed what they had just stolen.
The party were told that ‘slaves’ – non-Ogres – could not wear armour or be armed, even when we offered to help against the Drannai. I successfully claimed that my stiff leathers weren’t armour, just ordinary (tough) clothes. Good thing too, as we made our way to the shipyards to find Captain Rengrave, we saw a Dwarf helping them who used to be the first mate of the SS Shagnasty. He called the guards, who didn’t actually care too much about him, even when he claimed that we wanted revenge for his betrayal and defection to the Ogres.
We challenged him to a duel – a rather simple affair, we were given weapons at random by the Ogres. He dodged my scythe, he missed with his flail, then I critical-kicked his leg and almost killed him. We claimed the Dwarf as our slave and took him back to the boat to interrogate, but not before another member of the party was dragged into another, unrelated duel. Both sides rolled poorly, neither landing a blow on the other, till the slave he was fighting fumbled with a kick and broke his own leg.
After interrogating the Dwarf traitor, we found out that the captain was being held at the castle. We used the captive to trick our way into the castle, and found Rengrave lying on a hospital bed. He told us that he was the Ogre King now – the King must accept a challenge every year, and lost to Rengrave somehow. Which made the next request easier. We got the best ship that the Ogres have, and made ready to go rescue the boy that the Drannai, surprise surprise, had kidnapped.
We set off into the shiny blue ocean, to track down the boy.